A couple desperate to become parents have shared their heart-breaking story of miscarriages, debilitating pain and the diagnosis of a rare medical condition, as a surrogate gives them hope of finally becoming a mum and dad.
After five years together and a trip of a lifetime to America, Arlesey couple Lacey Mathieson and Adam O’Sullivan decided in 2018 to start a family together.
Thrilled to discover Lacey was pregnant in 2019, the pregnancy sadly ended in tragedy when Lacey suffered a miscarriage. “During this period, Lacey began experiencing quite a lot of pain, but put it down to changes in her body, and tried to heal and move forward with the journey,” Adam explained.
In April 2020, Lacey discovered she was pregnant again, but sadly this pregnancy also ended in miscarriage.
Adam, a pub manager, said: “By this point Lacey was experiencing a debilitating amount of pain that began to affect her life.” It left her unable to work, and she spent many days bedridden and in agony.
Having lost her mum to cervical cancer in 2016, Lacey, a nurse, was acutely concerned the gynaecological pain could be an indication of something seriously wrong, so she raised her concerns with her GP.
After numerous scans, Lacey was referred to a specialist who suspected endometriosis - a condition where tissue similar to the lining of the womb starts to grow in other places, such as the ovaries and fallopian tubes - and scheduled a laparoscopy to investigate further.
Adam, who grew up in Hitchin, said: “Nothing could have prepared us for the news we received after this. The operation determined that Lacey had an abnormality with her uterus called a unicornuate uterus, which in layman's terms is having half a uterus.
“This means that carrying her own baby would carry risks to Lacey’s life and her baby’s life. There are a few people out there who have been successful, however they are the token success stories.”
A unicornuate uterus is a genetic condition that causes only half of the uterus to form, and only a single fallopian tube to form instead of two. It is a rare abnormality affecting about 0.10 per cent of women - about 1 in 1,000.
There is an increased risk of ectopic pregnancy, late miscarriage, stillbirth or preterm birth. A natural pregnancy for a woman with a unicornuate uterus has a live foetal birth rate of 29 per cent, Adam explained.
Surgery in December last year, to remove the endometriosis and non-functioning part of Lacey's uterus, found endometriosis in her ovaries, ureters, bladder, bowels, appendix and ovaries.
Desperate to hold onto their dream of becoming parents, Adam and Lacey are now going down the route of surrogacy - when a woman carries and gives birth to a baby for another person or couple.
Adam said: "We have found a surrogate, who we will forever be thankful for. However, the financial costs alone could take us three to four years to save for. With a nurse's salary and me on furlough, this end point seems further and further away."
Costs involved with surrogacy - including fertility clinic fees, surrogacy agency fees and legal fees - can soon rack up. While UK law states that no payment can be made to a surrogate, intended parents often cover expenses such as loss of earnings, travel and childcare.
Adam said: "This has obviously been such a rollercoaster of emotions and unpredictability, however we are still trying to pursue our dream of having a family.
"While it may not be the conventional way, surrogacy is still a route, albeit the scenic route. Sometimes, just sometimes, the scenic route comes with the greatest adventures.
"We have decided to reach out to our family, our friends, and even the kindness of strangers - we need your help to complete our story. We just want to be a mum and dad. Please help us finish our journey."
Lacey and Adam have set up an online fundraising page in a bid to raise £17,500 towards affording to pay all the costs associated with the surrogacy. If you would like to support them, you can make a donation at uk.gofundme.com/f/lacey-and-adams-baby-fund
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